so as i mentioned in the manic ravings of my post yesterday, my first HPT test was yesterday morning.
i did the test and it was a shitty no name brand and after a few minutes it looked like nothing was there. i left and went back to check after another few minutes had passed and for a brief moment i thought i saw something. as i shifted and tilted the stick i would think i saw something and then i’d see flat out, bright white. i swear the brightest white you’ll ever see is in the background of a HPT. hmm, a new paint colour – HPT white?
i do what i always so with my HPTs, i shoved in the garbage can and put tissue on top of it so my husband wouldn’t see it. then i stuffed the empty box in the back of the bathroom cabinet until recycling day.
then this morning i again did what i always do and i jammed my hand into the garbage bin and pulled the test out to check it again. i am a glutton for punishment. i just need to blind myself with the white again to get my mind out of the clouds.
this time i saw a line
or i should say i saw the faintest line in the history of lines.
i have a pretty good track record with HPTs. i take them and they are starkly negative or very positive. when they are negative they never have a faint line the next day. i know that they warn that evaporation can result in a line and should not be taken as a proper result but as soon as i saw that line i knew i was in fact pregnant.
so this turn of events had me sitting with my husband on the back porch having a coffee before he headed off to work telling him a crazy woman and although it’s a waste of money i just have to go buy more tests. he agreed. and i actually didn’t feel so bad about the extra spending seeing as i found $20 in the garden yesterday. fate?!
he told me not to get too excited about it, HA, too late. although i did take my time. i went to home depot to grab more paint and then i took the long way to the store and i picked up a double pack of tests.
i had already had two pees this morning so before i left for the store i did my best to get what little had left in a cup. gross. so since i already had my sample waiting i didn’t hesitate to open the test, dunk it in and count to 5. i think that my counting to 5 is always way longer than 5 because i’m purposely trying not to be faster than 5.
i usually leave the room and pace around and pretend that the fate of my future isn’t developing in the next room but this time i wanted to see it happen. the little clock started flashing. it says it takes 3 minutes to process and i swear it took every second of those 3 minutes.
then all of a sudden, in a flash i saw
my beta is scheduled for thursday the 14th with my second beta falling on a saturday morning. this means i have to drive 45 minutes (on way) to the next major city to have my blood drawn (no saturday clinics in my town). since i’ve gotten a + 5 days before beta i wrote the nurses to see if could possibly have my test done on wednesday so that i can just have the second one done on friday and save the travel time.
i really hope i get at YES to that question as well.
thanks so much everyone for believing in this as being a possibility when i had clearly completely lost my faith! XOX